Sunday, May 26, 2019

"Silver Fish Eat Serotonin" personal reflections on Sad Sundays and lo-fi bedroom pop interludes

On this long Memorial Day weekend it is a big push to get the foundational stuff for the new site, PizzandFries in place. I had started it on one platform and decided it needed to be create correctly from the ground up so while that makes me far behind where I planned on being at this particular time, it is for the best. PizzandFries will be a sister site to American Pancake. Less driven by track reviews (although they will be there) and more driven by Press Notes in an effort to give an added avenue to artists that don't fit in my small focused AP box. AP has always been my personal and musical driven site for artists that appeal to me. Artists that push avant garde tones in all types of genres or that have such a unique voice creatively speaking. That is a tough, specific place to be for any artist and it occurs to me that so many other artists that I pass on are really great but do not fall into my little tiny view of what is so captivating. And to be truthful, I have odd tastes. I mean I still put "Punch Drunk Love" in my favorite movie of all times category and who does that. So, PizzandFries will serve another purpose. More on all the purposes it is intended to serve soon.

Last night I created some experimental pop, avant garde (a little) bedroom pop unexpectedly. I hadn't planned on it but felt that creative compulsion fueled by some simple keyboard meanderings. Dropped them in Reaper and turned them into a dissonant drone while you could still hear the subtle key note shifts. Tossed some D-tuned, capo'd acoustic guitar and instantly penned some stream of consciousness words. The melody was impromptu and quick and the odd little song or maybe it should be called an interlude because that is ultimately what it sounds like is named Silver Fish Eat Serotonin. It feels to me like a lullaby or a kiss goodbye to someone who has departed. I know, sad stuff. It feels apt for a Sad Sunday.

I have had this thing with Sundays. They sometimes feel like the saddest day of the week. Maybe it is because a full work week lies ahead and while I do appreciate and like my day job a ton, it is the simple act of having to work for a company, for someone else that ultimately touches on my deep seated issues of self reliance and doing things my way. When you work for anyone else you have to follow rules and practises after all. Not long ago for several Sundays in a row, as if my psychological clock was set to a panic alarm on Sunday mornings. I am not prone to deep depressions but during this period it felt like I was spiralling downward. That ended but not after some serious consequences.

Looking to work hard at pushing all personal and artistic projects. During this time I may be asking for a lot of support from you all. Letting you know ahead of time because I have trouble asking for help. Hey... if you are needing help in your personal life or your artistic life do not keep it all inside. Tell, ask, hug someone.

Take care--
Robb


2 comments:

  1. Sorry you were having a rough time, but glad you're better now. Love you!

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