"Who is Tom?"
Iliad have a lot to say even though they are essentially an instrumental rock outfit. I mean, take a look at their Facebook page and within the interweaving narrative of their Bio / their story (of sorts) they even cast out a human MacGuffin named Tom. This is to say, they are 3 smart and maybe deceiving young lads and while I am throwing out wild assumptions, casting out aspersions, if you will, from the brilliantly divergent, twisting shape of Yannaroddy, I can assume that, artistically speaking, they do have a whole lot to say. This soundtrack of the band moving to Dublin is full of interesting sounds.
Yannaroddy is a multi-colored piece of epic math rock, it starts with a cranking punk fury that feels kind of Buzzcockian but then shifts to something that feels like indie rock pushed through more bohemian filters. The song feels like a handful of musical dioramas stacked next to each other each one showing different images of sound. One has kind of surf rock guitars, jazz tripping drumming, and more like a Spaghetti Western of sounds. The song does come back to familiar melodies that feel like chill indie only to transform into a kind of 90's post art rock grandeur. It is literally all over the place but is able to make sense in this way.
Iliad says,
Yannaroddy is a cinematic, math rock piece, that bounces between soft, delicate moments and intense, groovy sections. The song was written as an instrumental commentary to living in a big city for college and returing home to a quiet rural area for the weekend and the varied lifestyle and soundtrack that comes with it.
Iliad is (see clarification in their story below) The Selfie Kid, BAEmax and Banquo based out of Dublin but originally from Donegal, (Ireland).
- Robb Donker Curtius
THE FACTS AS WE KNOW THEM - PRESS NOTES:
Money can buy anything. But money can not always give you what you want. You can’t buy happiness. What would you prefer? Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could be if he was rich. But are you happy?
There are some questions in life we never can answer. What is happiness?
What was the man who discovered milk doing to that cow? Who is Tom?
Sit back, relax and let the story unfold.
Baemax (Kris Kelly) is the man playing the guitar in this band. (Wait a minute, What band you say? All will become clear.) He is nice. A former Hollywood stunt double who specialised in big jump scenes, he was forced into an unexpected career change after a viral video of him eating his own bellybutton fluff tarnished his reputation and rendered him unemployable. He is nice. After relocating to Wales, Baemax worked as a paramedic for 5 years. However, a rebranding of the emergency services saw him replaced by a younger, quicker, better looking paramedic. He was nice.
After winning his unfair dismissal case, Baemax used his compensation payoff to buy a small cottage in Leap, County Cork. He is nice.
Baemax joined Iliad (Who?) in 2016 after meeting drummer Banquo whom he bought a second hand frying pan from on Adverts. He was nice. The pair hit it off immediately after discovering they had a shared interest in vinyl and the colour beige. They are also big Hall and Oates fans. Hall and Oates are nice.
Enter Banquo. He (Anton Shovlin) bangs the drums in the band. The call to music came after his previous job of professional tea-maker was starting to take a toll on his mental health, as the pressure of exceeding expectations had reached boiling point. Desperate to find a new source of income, he joined DOD’s Cool Crazy Carnival Circus Commotion. Travelling all over mainland Europe, working as a trainee toilet attendant, gave him a real taste for the stage, a real yearn for the rock’n’roll lifestyle. Around this time, he got into the underground poker scene, took up an avid interest in cute Asian women and bought a horse. Soon enough he bore a bastard son, which led to him experimenting with drugs. A party after one show got messy and he mistakenly overdosed on Ket. In a drug haze, he abandoned his son in the dark of night and fled for home, awakening at his father and rich stepmothers’ house (she always did have a soft spot for him). Once getting clean and settling back to a normal life, he met Selfie Kid at a “special-guest” legal open poker tournament and decided he liked the colour of his trousers.
The Selfie Kid (Conor Lyons). People seem to like him because he is polite and rarely late. A lover of Ice cream, his passion for the frozen delicacy is only surpassed by his feeling towards slacks (green ones particularly). Especially women’s slacks (he finds that they give him the confidence he needs to go about his day).Born into a family of waterslide enthusiasts, he specialises in the form of smoothly operating his way into the DM’s of unsuspecting cowboy builders, baiting them into a roofing job before confronting them and exposing them to his social media followers. It was his best work. On the side, he likes to paint and was once a regular feature on the children’s favourite, ‘Art Attack’. However, after irregularities in the companies pension fund were flagged, funding was cut and so was he. It was his best work. He now plays bass in multiple bands, selling himself to the highest bidder anywhere in the Dublin area (travel is free) and has been playing with Iliad for fun, sorry, since 2016.
Yes you guessed it. Tom was just an elaborate ruse to get your attention. Pose a question and people just want to keep reading. This was just a detailed account of how the band Iliad came to be. A three piece Cinematic, Math Rock, Non-Stop band who hate using adjectives to describe their sound, so they reached out to me and asked me to write a wee piece for them. I feel like it’s my best work. Unless, this is another joke and it’s really just a ‘Tide’ ad? No, I’m just messing with your heads haha. Just like ‘Tide’ are messing with their competitors heads with the release of their new pod. With one dose of the re-engineered Original liquid PODS™ formulas, you get the same cleaning power as 10 doses of the leading liquid bargain brand detergent. Tides in, dirt's out - ‘Tide’ Washing Powder.
But yes, Iliad, check them out.
“Let me not then die ingloriously and without a struggle, but let me first do some great thing that shall be told among men hereafter.”
Love,
Uncle Homer xx
Love,
Uncle Homer xx
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